Opinion

MANUEL BUENCAMINO | Hands off Enrile's staff, please

InterAksyon.com
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Our only business is with Senate President Juan Ponce Enrile's public life, whether he behaved above board in handling the finances of the Senate and whether or not his long time chief-of-staff Atty. Gigi Reyes stepped over the line as the senator's most trusted aide. So let's move on and give Atty. Reyes credit for tendering her irrevocable resignation immediately after Sen. Cayetano's privilege speech.

Everyone agrees she did the right thing except Enrile, to whom she is indispensable. "I will talk to her," he said. "I will convince her to stay because there are so many administrative matters that I can no longer handle and in which she is more knowledgeable."

I was curious how Enrile would use his persuasive powers to talk Reyes out of her decision so I activated the listening device that I surreptitiously implanted on Enrile's neck many years ago, back when I was working undercover for a not-to-be-named spy agency.

I turned the device on by remote control and put on my headphones. I waited. And waited. That's what spies do 99 percent of the time. We wait. I must have fallen asleep at some point because Johnny and Gigi were in the thick of it when I finally caught up with them.

"My God Gigi, don't let go now! Hold tight!"

"It's going to get very messy if I don't let go right now, Sir."

"I don't care about the mess! Just keep doing what you are doing."

"But, Sir, quitting now is for your own good. It's the only way to stop Senator Alan Peter from shafting you with your own staff."

"But you can't quit! I've never had anyone like you. And you know I can't do it by myself anymore. Not at my age."

 "I'm tired. What else can I say? We had a great run."

"Don't talk to me in the past tense! My God, I'm still Senate President. I have power in me yet."

"But Sir…This could blow up in our faces."

 "Anong but but? What's the matter, are you tired of giving me a helping hand?"

 "Sir, your BP is shooting up. Let's stop this. NOW."

"MY GOD, GIGI…"

"Medic!!!"

I don't know what happened next because my wife called from downstairs, "Get your ass down here breakfast is getting cold!"

I rushed downstairs and told her, "Honey, you’re not going to believe what I listened to all night long…"

"What do you mean listened? You started to snore as soon as you put on your headphone. You were dreaming."

"I was?"

Whew.

Anyway, as I was saying, let's just all put a stop to all the talk about an illicit love affair between Senate President Juan Ponce Enrile and Atty. Reyes. It is none of our business what Enrile does with his staff.

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