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I resigned my lucrative job with a major company due to the sexual advances of my immediate boss. When I applied for a job in three organizations, every hiring manager asked me the reason for my resignation but I gave them different explanations for fear that the truth will jeopardize my chances of landing a new job. Is this the right approach? – Double Trouble.
Imagine that you’re a four-year old girl. Your father makes the following test: If you will wait until he returns home from work, you can have three small pieces of chocolate candy for a treat. If you can’t wait until then, you can have only one – and you can have it anytime, even in his absence.
It’s a derivative of the age-old marshmallow test on deferred gratification. It is a challenge that is sure to try the soul of any four-year old, boy or girl – a microcosm of the eternal battle between impulse and restraint or desire and self-control.
It offers a quick reading of one’s character that a child will probably take through life.
If you wait for your father to secure your three pieces of candy, then you have a positive personality, according to psychologist Daniel Goleman. I’m raising that as a factor because you failed to clarify what you have done prior to your resignation. I mean, did you raise the issue of sexual advances by your boss with your top management? Why or why not?
In the first place, does your company have a sexual policy against sexual harassment? In the absence of such policy, are you aware of Republic Act No. 7877 or the Anti-Sexual Harassment Act of 1995?
Sure, you don’t want to talk about your unpleasant experience with anyone, much more to your prospective employer who may be intimidated by your character. But really, you can’t avoid this issue in the long run. If you decide to keep this behind you, then chances are history will repeat itself with your prospective employer.
Remember that employers will hire people based on their total qualification and potentials. They may not reject job applicants on a single issue, particularly in this case which is not your fault.
Therefore, if you will ask me, I’d rather that you tell your true story. It is a good opportunity for you to determine if your prospective employer is someone who has the integrity and intention of protecting your kind from any sexual advances of other employees or management officials.
Besides, it is the duty of any employer “to prevent or deter the commission of acts of sexual harassment and to provide the procedures for the resolution, settlement or prosecution,” according to R.A. 7877.
I’m not blaming you for leaving that company. Some people react differently to the same situation. It’s a fight or flight syndrome. You’ve decided to withdraw and that’s your choice. What is important is what you will do in the future, particularly when searching for another job.
It will also depend on whether you will list down your former employer in your job application. The application process if properly handled is a great opportunity for you to present sufficient reasons to convince your prospect that you are a person with strong character needed by any organization.
Controlling the application process is a matter of attitude and confidence. The best way to feel in control is to think without a mental baggage.
Ask yourself if you are meeting the minimum requirements of the job vacancy and tailor your answers and questions to satisfy your agenda. Are you ready to tell the whole truth the moment the same question is raised again by other employers?
You must be ready to tell the truth. It will show your true character which could probably match the job requirements. If not, then so be it. That employer is not for you because you really don’t want to have that experience again.
You don’t want to become rattled again when another sexual harasser comes to you. Therefore, the best way is to identify this employer during the application process and not when you are already gainfully employed.
Challenge?
This blog is for non-management people who cannot raise an issue directly against one’s boss for fear of reprisal. If you’re part of management who has an opposing or supporting view about this article, then send us your feedback citing your experience or a published material by a management expert. Send feedback to elbonomics@gmail.com
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